What God is Doing

A few weeks ago I listened to a sermon (the first I've heard in ages actually) and part of it was about sharing with others what God is doing in our lives. I really debated putting this on FB but God is moving and I feel like it's important to tell others. Some of you know, but most of you don't, that I've been pregnant since July. And last night around 6 pm I went to the ER and found out I had had a miscarriage. This was literally my worst nightmare come to life. The thing I've been most afraid of happening since I was maybe sixteen years old and first realized I could have a baby. Since I found out I was pregnant I have lived with neverending nagging fear.

And last night, with all my fears justified, my God came to me and gave me comfort. He assured me that I was not being punished and I was not to blame. He spoke to my heart that although Satan meant this for my harm God would use it for my good. Several months ago I read the book "10 Minutes in Heaven" and when he goes to heaven there are people he's known waiting for him to welcome him to heaven. And when I read it I thought about how there is no one waiting for me. Everyone I love is still here. And last night Jesus brought this back to me and let me know that maybe he just wanted me to have someone at the gate. My sweet baby Katie waiting for me with Jesus.

And now I have nothing to fear. No more reasons to be afraid. If God can walk with me through my worst nightmare then he will never leave.

My favorite song is a Jars of Clay song and the part that always comes to me in times of distress came to me again last night "Though the pain is an ocean, tossing us around, around, around. You have calmed greater waters and higher mountains have come down. I will sing of your mercies that lead me through valleys of sorrow to rivers of joy." Rivers of joy. That's what's coming.

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