31+5= Sam's Birthday & 31 Days of Him Being Ours

Yesterday marked Sam’s 5th Birthday and our 31st day caring for him. It was a hectic day, and I am fairly certain I am birthday partied out for at least 6 months. And that is saying something because my birthday is rapidly approaching.

After we (more Carrie) put Sam to bed, I was cleaning up and saw this commercial and it had all of these adults in a different situations, and one was a mom hosting a birthday party. WHAT???!!!! She had time to talk to the camera and form cogent sentences. Maybe that comes with time, but Sam’s birthday party would be the last place I would have time to talk to a camera. Funny thing is that after the party was over we had a follow up interview with Both Hands & LifeSong about our Both Hands project. Guess what, I had problems forming cogent sentences. Good thing Carrie is smart and stuff. She knows how to use her words but me not so much.

Thinking back on these 31 days of caring for Sam, it has not always been easy, but Carrie and I have always tried to be good parents, which is really hard, because we have no experience caring for a 5 year old. Especially, when you factor in that fact that he was in an orphanage and does not speak or understand very much English. He does understand more than he lets on. Like one day, I was asking Carrie about him falling asleep in the car, and I hear from the backseat, “не (not) sleep.” I am especially trying to figure out how to be consistent with punishment. Especially, when he figures out so quickly how to say the just the right thing (in English) so he doesn’t get a time-in (nerdy term, but that is what it is). I am onto you Sam, and becoming immune. The biting, farting, and spitting have pretty much stopped. He still farts, but mainly for performance purposes. The name calling (in Russian….we are onto you Sam) and telling us that he doesn’t love haven’t stopped, but are becoming less frequent, but still occur when he doesn’t get what he wants. I think the hardest single principle that we are teaching him is to be patient. Most of his meltdowns are because he is not patient. I know that it is a trust issue and that the more he trusts us the more the patient he will become.

We are 31 days in, and all I have to say is that adoption the process and parenting an adopted child are not for the faint of heart and are the most difficult thing I have done and continue to do (I think Carrie will back me up on that), but if God has placed adoption on your heart how can you say no? My life hasn’t become easier, but it is better, and I am consistently seeing God’s Hand in my life more than ever before. The correlations between how Sam responds to me as parents and how, in turn, I respond to God are remarkable. The biggest similarity is that as I trust God more the more patient I have become for God to provide for my family and me. I don’t know if Sam gets amazed with the ways we provide for him, but I definitely continue to be очень очень (very very) amazed with how God provides.